I'm not happy about this. I used to pride myself on my self-discipline and reliability. I Took Care Of Business. Now, I take care of myself. While this is not a bad thing in principle, it is not good in practise. By avoiding my responsibilities, as represented by my phone, I take care of myself at the expense of my self-respect and other people's trust.
And, it turns out, at the expense of my cat.
It all started with a call to my voice mail last Friday. I hadn't looked checked it for two days, hadn't picked up my phone for three. Wednesday I was charging the phone, and Thursday I was just worn out. I heard the phone ring around 6:30, and I thought, I don't want to talk to anyone and thus they shouldn't want to talk to me. (Who wants to talk to a grump with little news and less to say?) However, on Friday I realized I needed to check back in. While I'm sure D or people at work will keep me posted regarding the next natural disaster or the beginning of World War III, the more personal things will only be covered by my personal connections.
So, as I left work, I pulled out my phone. It was 6 p.m., New Mexico time, 5 p.m., Portland time. Since the New Mexico police are militant about catching drivers with cellphones, I sat in the truck, A/C running, radio muted, and started taking notes. Oh, I missed sister E's call on Wednesday. She wants to Skype, and so do I. Darn. Someone else called and hung up. Now it's the Thursday call.....the Woodstock vet?! Huh? The words are slightly garbled, but it sounds like they have my cat. How could that be?
Yikes, it's after 5 pm on a Friday. Most businesses will be closed, but probably not a vet. I offer up a prayer that the Woodstock Vet is of this enlightened crew and make the call.
The receptionist is confused by my call, which should have been my first warning. Finally she realizes that they called me first, and I am merely returning the favor. I have no idea what I am calling about, and I hope she will.
She does. Ah, yes, your cat Simon (ummm, it's Simone), was brought in Thursday and we found your phone number through her chip. She is very proud of the fact that the chip is doing it's job. I'm even more confused: that chip is 7 years old, and I have not paid the upkeep since the first year. From all I've read about the chip, you have to maintain the service. Also, there is no reason Simone should be brought in as a stray. While she has no collar, she is clearly a pampered kitty with a good home. (Yes, she has managed to wear me out and I no longer try to replace the collars she ditches within 2 hours of receipt. It's not the expense, it's the annoyance.)
Besides, I just heard from H this last week. She sent pix of Simone impersonating a cute internet kitty. Clearly, E and H are taking proper care of her.
So, what happened? The receptionist does not know, but she is expecting me to come in to retrieve my cat. I explain that is not going to happen: I am in New Mexico. I ask if she can contact the current caretakers, who I believe should be on file with them. Louie, their pet of 17 years, was a regular visitor.
Hmmm, that does ring a bell, and she'll make a note that they have permission to pick up Simone, but she is not going to call them. Nor is she going to call the person who kidnapped my cat and brought her in. She verifies that the cat they have is a tuxedo kitty, and that's all she can do for me, but she informs me cheerfully that they'll be open until 6 and again on Saturday, 8-4.
So, I panic, trying to reach E and H and spare my poor abused kitty another night in prison. I can't find their number in my phone, because it's D's old phone. (I had replaced my laundered phone with his phone, and while they changed the phone number, they did not replace the contacts info. He has a lot of contacts, but I can't find E and H under any permutations of names and nicknames. Later I discover that the phone converted Hollybeth into Beth, Holly. Stupid elecrtonics.)
I call D. He is en route, having picked up sopapillas and green chili stew for our dinner. I beg him to call E and H, and when I get home I call their home phone. Neither of us can reach them, and, as a last ditch effort, I leave an e-mail.
H calls me, but again I miss the phone call. So, she e-mails me at 12:14 am, and I get that message when I wake up.
So E says there was one day this week when she remembers wondering where Simone got to. (Usually if the weather's nice she's in and out, every couple hours.) And right before Simone came to stay with us, E had to persuade a neighbor across the street that Fela the neighbor cat is a local and not lost. So I guess the vet let neighbor lady take Simone away again and quietly release her back here?
That kitty has her secrets, doesn't she. :)
I reply:
I guess the vet released her, if Simone was back in your hands last night. I talked with the vet at 5 pm yesterday, and Simone was still there, so I frantically was trying to reach you. Apparently she had been imprisoned since Thursday, when the first call came (I seem to be ignoring my phone and my email lately.)
I'm confused.
but as long as she's safe, that's all that matters. Thanks!
H adds to my confusion:
No, she was definitely here every morning when I got up; she's very prompt because I give her wet food for breakfast. And there hasn't been an entire evening when I never saw her, either. I am confused too.
What will be really interesting is if you get another call from the vet saying she's still there.
Simone had a nice day rolling in the dirt in the backyard (why, cat, why?) and playing with Elizabeth's sunglasses.
I had plans to call the vet back and ferret out what happened, but my usual inertia kicked in and I dropped the matter. However, last night E found me on gmail and we had the following chat:
E: Went down to Woodstock Vet today to see if I could sort out what was going on. The receptionist was as confused as I was. But we all agree that they don't have Simone.
10:52 PM (Although they apparently did at one point?)
10:53 PM In any case, Simone is having a lovely time in the litterbox as we speak. :-/
***********
11:01 PM me: thank for checking up on that. Weird.
11:02 PM E: Yeah! For a while, we were all, "Do we have a faux!Simone?"
11:05 PM me:...a faux Simone? not possible, she is unique!
E: I was quite nervous that I'd go down to the vet.....and they'd have a petite and graceful tuxedo kitty...who was quite social and liked to sit on shoulders.
11:06 PM At which point, I'd be all, "So who the fuck did we kidnap from refgoddess' house two months ago??"
me: :)
E: H was all, "If they do have another Simone there, you have to call me RIGHT AWAY."
11:07 PM In case, you know, there were alternate reality implications. Wouldn't want to catastrophically collapse one reality into another by bringing the two Simones into close proximity.
THAT MIGHT END THE WORLD.
11:11 PM me: So, did the receptionist actually call me? Did I talk with her? I was under the distinct impression that she had S right there: I asked for a verification and everything. but maybe she was just looking at the report.
11:13 PM E: I never talked to the receptionist that talked to you. The receptionist I talked to was looking at her notes....and her notes seemed to indicate that Simone was there, even though she wasn't. And the receptionist I talked to didn't understand how Simone could have been there, and then just somehow ended up back in our neighborhood again.
So. Dunno.
And that's where we decide to leave the mystery. It's late, and I need my sleep. But the next day I look up the "Schrodinger's cat" thought experiment and I try to explain it to D. He is not interested, but I think quantum physics might have the answer. Much as I like alternate reality theories, I don't think they are going to explain how Simone was in two places at once, nor how she teleported herself home. I am convinced it has something to do with the Copenhagen interpretation.
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